Why do you stop yourself from starting?

The first step to achieving your goals is getting out of your own way.

It’s been 12 months since I first stepped on stage to perform stand-up for the first time.

But technically speaking, I’m two to three years into my journey.

I wasted a lot of time talking about trying stand-up, testing jokes with friends, dreaming about my Netflix special, but did nothing to make it happen.

Why?

Well, multiple reasons. Various forms of subtle self-sabotage that stopped me from making a start. 

I’m sure there are plenty of other creatives out there doing the same thing. Out there standing in their own way.  

So I’ve taken some time to reflect on the big four ‘procrasti-traps’ I faced and the ways I overcame them. 

Procrasti-trap #1: Telling people your goals.

You: “Hey I’m going to [try stand-up / write a tv show / become a DJ].”

Them: “Wow, that’s awesome!”

This makes you feel good, doesn’t it?

That’s because when we promote our goals, it releases a level of dopamine akin to achieving them. 

Meaning we can feel like we’ve completed something without even starting. 

If we reward ourselves prematurely simply by talking about our goals, our brains are less likely to invest the energy required to achieve them and we go nowhere. 

The solution? Keep your goals to yourself or at least start working towards them first. Then you can tell people what you are doing, instead of what you are “going to do”. 

Procrasti-trap #2: Having too many goals.

As a creative person with varied interests, I had a million different ideas, which turned into a million different reasons not to pick one.

I became a casualty of choice overload.

In marketing, choice overload occurs when an individual is overwhelmed by the number of options available.

We struggle to compare each option; weighing up the potential outcomes as well as the risks associated with making an incorrect choice, which leads to anxiety or choice paralysis. 

Think about browsing an online store with the intent of buying something but ending up with nothing because there were too many options.

The same can be said for creative projects; writing a newsletter, becoming a photographer or starting a podcast.

My Notes app is a graveyard of creative ambitions from over the years.

So how did I whittle down my options and land on trying stand-up?

• I wrote down all of my interests and goals and looked for common threads; I love comedy, I consider creative writing a strength, I wanted to gain confidence in presenting and have the ability to create and execute things myself.

• I also minimised “all or nothing” thinking; I enrolled in a short stand-up course with the view of completing it and then allowing myself to decide whether to continue or not. If I wanted to try something new afterwards, that would have been ok. 

Procrasti-trap #3: Growing cold from comparison.

Have you ever been excited for a new idea, and then you grow cold on it because you see someone else do it better?

Negative self-talk, self-doubt and imposter syndrome are all part of starting something new. 

Comparison can be the thief of joy, but it also can provide a roadmap to success. 

I talked more about surrounding yourself with experts in my last newsletter, but if you see someone doing something that interests you, ask them about it and learn.

If you have no way of getting in touch, then you have to get creative and make some educated guesses.

That’s what I did:

I had a crack at guessing what skills and habits were required to be a successful comedian, based on Jerry Seinfeld. 

Seinfeld is brilliant at his craft; he has sold out stadium shows, has won the Emmys and earned the cash to prove it. 

Looking at his comedy style:

1. He is a master of observational comedy.

2. He famously finesses every word in his set.

3. His delivery is natural and conversational.

4. He dresses the part, wearing suits to perform.

5. Back in the day he was on stage honing his craft every night.

So if Jerry is a 10 in all of these things and all of these things helped him be successful, how do I compare? Where would I rate myself for each? 

I mapped it all out on a graph and did a gap analysis:

After doing this, I had a think about the available training, courses, resources and people that would help me improve in each. 

And yada yada yada, I had myself an action plan on how to start.

Procrasti-trap #4: Failing to plan.

Thomas Edison said “Vision without execution is hallucination”.

It’s one thing to have a goal. It’s another to have the systems and structures in place to bring it to life.

Trying to get ahead through willpower and self-discipline leaves too much to chance.

You need to carve out whatever time you can give in pursuit of this goal and systemise it. 

It could be one hour a day, or five hours a week, or two hours on both Saturday and Sunday. 

Whatever it is, identify it, agree to it, block it out and protect it at all costs. 

This is your time to focus; to write, create, play, practice, whatever your goal requires of you. 

It’s important to have a system in place. This type of structure is there for when you’re in a creative rut or just not in the mood. 

If you stay true to the agreement with yourself, you will make sure you’re not just hallucinating, and you’re progressing towards your goals. 

Climbing out of the traps

It’s never easy to look close up at your shortcomings.

But it’s even harder to let your dreams go unrealised.

Reflecting on the ways I was holding myself back helped me get out of my own way. 

Everyone is different. Others may have more complicated lives, less time, families to support, more demanding jobs.

But by being self-aware and knowing what you personally need to do to get from A to B will help you remove any self-imposed barriers.

So, what is stopping you from starting?